Why Some Teenagers Don’t Get Along With Their Parents | Sadhguru Answers

[Music] men do it one way women do it another way classes will happen because you need one kind of space they need another kind of space how do we handle this so this is one thing you have to earn as you get older [Music] how do we make sure that your students and faith and energy of youth work together [Music] they've always been at odds not just today older generation and the younger generation the real problem is this the older generation do not think they are old the younger generation think that they are old enough that's the whole problem the old don't want to believe they are old young don't want to believe they're young they think they're old enough for everything so somebody is occupying the space that you want to occupy it's not just among human beings especially among elephants you will see suddenly one young bull elephant going all over the place angry pulling out everything because he has a fight with the bigger male elephant in the herd he's not vacating his space so this guy tries to fight he cannot fight he doesn't have the strength so he freaks [Music] adolescence so this is why this is why in this country we made what is called as varnasrama dharma that means from 0 to 12 is balabasta childhood just play body and brain should grow 12-24 is brahmacharya time to discipline yourself bring discipline into your body into your mind develop your energies so that you're a powerful being and acquire knowledge 24 you can choose if you want to if you see through life as you are you don't have to go through everything you are able to see through then you become a sannyasi at 24 otherwise you become a householder you get married so if you get married at 24 two cycles of the solar cycle and 24 years that means you're 48. that means your children are somewhere between 18 to 22. they're like the young bulls they want you to go but they can't say it today in the modern world we send away the children we don't go we send them away somewhere else these asylums are usually called universities or but those days because life was around agriculture you could you could not leave home and go away because your land is here your animals are here you can't go away somewhere and make a life somebody has to go out so at 48 the old couple 48 old couple they took sannyas and they went different ways husband went into one institution wife went into another one working on their spiritual sadhana 12 years 60 they came out and they once again got married today they don't go away they're still together and they're still getting married at 60. now you're supposed to go away for 12 years first time when you're married maybe compulsions of the body emotion something else took over now all the things are over you've done your spiritual sadhana for 12 years now you come together in a completely different way and go into warner prastha that means go into the jungle live the last part of your life so there was space i'm saying when you wanted the parents to disappear they disappeared now they're not going they want you to go if you have found your legs in the world you want to go even before they let you go but if you not found your legs class for some reason if you've not found your legs or wings clashes every day clashes between parents and children you must understand because of emotions they believing their parents or children and children but when it comes down to life it's just a young bull and a big bull clashing for space clashing for dominance men do it one way women do it another way but the fundamental problem is same you want your space they're not vacating the space classes will happen children who live away always love you yes yes or no children who live away from you they always love you that's the way to keep them if they were with you [Music] not because you're bad or they're bad because you need one kind of space they need another kind of space both are in the same space heat will happen unless you have children who grown very old when they are young you understand you successfully made them very old people when they're still young such people will live very compatibly with old people if you become sick then they may become okay because now the emotion of wanting to take care those kind of things will come in but if you are well and strong and they're well and strong you must keep them away yes so this is not a new problem i'm sure in the cave i am talking about the cave man in the cave the same problem existed between the young and the old because old do not believe they have grown old young believe they are old enough for everything so there will be something going on how do we handle this how do we handle this is the old should learn to keep on stepping back the young will keep on occupying that space only thing is the old should display a certain level of wisdom and experience where the young are little overawed by the old if you don't do that then the young will disdain and they'll get rough in so many ways so this is one thing you have to earn as you get old you have earned a certain level of wisdom and insight into life which they're here to earn so they look up to you then you can somewhat be in the same space first floor but reasonably in the same space leave the ground flow to them and the first floor they're looking up to you okay if they have nothing to look up to if you exposed yourself with your problems and with your nonsense and everything then best vana i know this is not the answer you're looking for but what shall i do i am not a politician to say the right thing i'll say what is true [Music] you