How to Handle Difficult Relationships? | Sadhguru

you're in the job you'll suffer you'll get fired you suffer if you're married you will suffer if you're not married you suffer what is the problem these are things that you aspired for when things that you aspire for happen then you suffer this must be looked at [Music] while we deal with difficult relationships where one cannot avoid the other person be the boss or your wife more often than not i feel out of control and the whole environment seems to be conniving against me can i deal with the situation on my own is it okay to blame somebody else what do you suggest is the way to get back to life in a positive way see the best thing about this is uh you're only facing one of them either boss or the wife never two of them together so you can oscillate you know [Laughter] as a military man you can escape the wife for some time and you can escape the boss for some time unlike other jobs where every day they have to face i'm sorry i'm just joking like this [Laughter] anyway see you can neither live without your wife nor your boss both are important in your life you sought the career and you got into the job you got a boss you sought my relationship you got into marriage and you got a wife so these are things that you aspired for when things that you aspire for happen then you suffer this must be looked at this is not about the wife this is not about the boss this is something to do with yourself because human beings have gotten into this place wherever you place them they have found a way to suffer this happened one day shankaran pillai had a mega fight with his wife then in a fit of fury he left the home and walked away in the evening he lighted here and there just outside the town he was moving around not knowing where to go what to do going back home immediately was not palatable then he saw a sadhu a sannyasi was settled down settling down beneath the tree for the evening or the night he looked at him and he looks he seems to be very well organized and absolutely no issues under the tree he seems to be perfectly fine then he went to him and said sadhu maharaj that was glad at him like this bev [Laughter] so see we say this like uh life is like juggling a ball if you're alone just one ball easy to do you become two two balls little more difficult more leads more attention then you become four you have four balls to juggle then you have an indian army on you you have ten thousand balls to juggle how do you so how many balls can you juggle joyfully that's how many you should pick up if you aspire or enhance your activity without enhancing yourself activity will cause misery so people you know one top executive in the country of an international company a global ceo came to me some time ago and in a deep state of distress and said sadhguru i can't take this they're putting so much stress on me i looked at him and said okay then may you be fired he said no no sadhguru what are you saying i said hey you're suffering your job so much i'm sure there are many people who are aspiring for your job if you get fired you can walk the beach happily no no no sadhguru don't do that to me so if you're in the job you'll suffer you'll get fired if you suffer if you're married you will suffer if you are don't if you're not married you suffer what is the problem the problem is this with this one not with the wife not with the boss not with the world whatever they may be i'm not trying to defend them they may be anything but whether i suffer or don't suffer is essentially with me as i said earlier what the world throws at you is not your choice what you make out of it is 100 your choice this is what karma means when i say my life is my karma wife is somehow bosses somehow the world around you is somehow all kinds of nuisance happening but uh i keep this one the way i want you may i know you face different kind of enemy but we face all kinds of people every day people that i've never met that i do not know they have they are spewing venom on me on daily basis i don't know from where that venom comes maybe it's just extra protein in their body i don't know but they go on endlessly doing all kinds of things putting all kinds of obstacles to everything that we do everything that we do is inclusive for larger well-being but they don't like it there are people campaigning right now against me today that tree planting is dangerous okay your existence itself is dangerous so what people do to you what the world does to you this is how it is what do you want to do to yourself that is in your hands this is your karma this is what it means by saying my life is my karma means the way i am is 100 mind nobody nobody can decide how i will be right now it's me who decides how i am right now if you decide how you are right now will you keep yourself blissful or miserable if you can answer this one question all of you [Music] you